快了一步/葛本保(赵金基译）

程思良

快了一步/葛本保
　　
　　好多年过去了，一想到他我就烦。
　　当兵的日子，我是小兵，他是副班长；等我努力当了副班长时候，他却是我的班长。回到了地方，我当队长，他当科长；我终于当上科长时，他又当了处长！
　　他做什么总是快一步，抢尽了我做人的风光，我却百思不解。
　　昨天，我喝多了酒，没有醒来，很快被送到了青松翠柏的火葬场。
　　我是今天第一个客户！
　　谁知就在等待中，又有一辆殡葬车在身后嘎然而至。原来他昨晚打麻将，一个杠后炸的兴奋引发心脏病复发，也是抢救无效。
　　在亲人哭天喊地的声音中，我却有一种窃喜，这回我总算先他一步了！
　　“嗨，这回头一炉灰是我的了！”我自豪地和他打了一个招呼。
　　他大度，微微笑了笑。
　　直到殡葬馆服务员先走到他的车前，我才醒悟过来。喂，你们弄错了没有？是我先到的！
　　他诡秘地冲我又笑了笑，我让家人偷偷塞给了他们二百块钱……
　　
　　One Step Ahead
　　
　　By Ge Benbao
　　
　　For many years I have been annoyed at the thought of him.
　　While I was a private in the army, he was the vice-chief of our squad; when I rose to the role of vice-chief, he became my chief. While I was a team leader in society, he was a section chief; when I rose to the role of section chief, he became a director!
　　He’s been taking the lead, getting one step ahead of me; I’ve tried in vain to work out the puzzle.
　　Yesterday I drank too much and didn’t wake up; then I was taken to the crematory surrounded by green cypresses and pines.
　　Now I am the first customer today!
　　I am waiting my turn when suddenly a second funeral car arrives; it turns out that, while he was playing mahjong last night, an unexpected good fortune contributed to his having an incurable heart attack.
　　Amidst my folks mourning, I feel kind of delighted; here I am, one step ahead of him!
　　“Hey, I am the first today.” I offer him a proud greeting.
　　He returns a generous smile.
　　“Hey! What’s wrong? I’m the first.” I don’t understand until an attendant comes over to his car.
　　“I’ve told my folk to slip 200yuan…” He casts a mysterious smile at me.

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