醋风/语嫣独话(赵金基译）

程思良

醋风/语嫣独话
　　
　　某县有个人事局长，姓梁，有脂肪肝。医生介绍他喝醋治疗，为了保命，他早也喝，晚也喝，连酒桌上的应酬都换成了醋。
　　梁也算是个人物，每次下县考核干部，屁股后面都跟了一大群要官跑职的人。一次下县，吃饭的时候，几个下属好奇地盯着他的酒杯问：“梁局，你咋喝醋呀？”梁不好意思说自己的病，就搪塞道：“风气，风气。”底下人一揣摩，以为是指示，马上就把杯里的五粮液给泼掉了，都换成了醋，齐刷刷地举着杯子对他敬酒：“来，梁局，把醋干了！”从此，该县就狂飙醋风，大大小小官员的酒桌上全是醋——一时间该县的醋便卖得脱销。
　　有一天，一个想调整职务的干部，趁梁不在，到他家送礼。局长夫人一开门，来人就讪笑着递上几瓶陈醋：“这是我从山西搞来的百年老醋，请笑纳。”
　　局长夫人脸上一阵红一阵白。“滚出去！”她勃然大怒。
　　以后，该县谈醋色变。
　　
　　Vinegar
　　
　　By Yuyan
　　
　　Mr. Liang, personnel director, suffers from hepatic adipose infiltration. Doctors suggest he drink vinegar to save his life. Therefore, vinegar has been part of his meals both in the morning and in the evening; even at dinner parties, he drinks vinegar instead of wine.
　　Since Mr. Liang is in a key position, he is frequently pursued by those who long for a promotion. “Director, why do you like vinegar so much?” Once at a dinner party, several subordinates wondered aloud. “I enjoy its flavor.” Mr. Liang was ashamed of confessing his own ailment. Assuming that Mr. Liang was leading a trend, all subordinates poured away Wuliangye wine and refilled their glasses with vinegar. “Come on, director. Cheers!” They extended a toast in unison. Since then, the trend of drinking vinegar has begun in the whole county. Vinegar is universally drunk over dinners, so much so that it has been out of stock at stores.
　　One day a low-ranking official came around while Mr. Liang was not at home. When Mrs. Liang opened the door, the visitor rediculously presented a few bottles of vinegar. “Here is 100-year-old vinegar from Shanxi. Do me a favor, please.”
　　Mrs. Liang turned red; then her face got pale. “Out you go!” She flew into a rage.
　　Later, the whole county turns pale at the mention of the word “vinegar”.

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