文凭/许国江(赵金基译）

程思良

文凭/许国江
　　
　　单位人浮于事，临时工、合同工辞退了以后，人员依然超编。
　　在全体工作人员会议上，局长说超编人员将继续精简。从单位人员结构和文化层次考虑，精简的重点是没有学历、没有文凭的职工。局长说这话的时候，眼光向周吴郑王等人扫了一遍，最后竟然落到了老丁的身上。
　　老丁是单位门卫，看了十多年大门，为人机灵乖巧，可谓见多识广。他见局长盯了他一眼，非常反感。他在心中说：你看着我干么？你以为我是精简的重点吗？哼！
　　散会以后，老丁立马找到了局长。老丁捧着一个烫着金字的红本本对局长说：局长，你看看这是什么？
　　局长接过来一看，感到十分惊讶，局长说：你什么时候上过大专？你这文凭哪来的？
　　老丁笑道：局长你怎么忘了？他扳着指头数了数，五年前你在职进修本科的时候，我就知道这年头没有文凭不行，于是我紧紧跟上，报名读了函授大学，你还没毕业，我就拿到了大专文凭。去年你上研究生进修班的时候，我本来也想来个专升本，可是由于费用没地方报销，就放弃了。要不然，我现在是本科在读。你拿到硕士研究生文凭时，我也拿到了本科文凭。
　　局长将信将疑，他把老丁重新审视了一番，一时语塞。
　　
　　Diplomas
　　
　　By Xu Guojiang
　　
　　The Unit was overstaffed. Temporaries and contractors dismissed, the personnel was still too large.
　　At the staff gathering, Director General declared a further streamlining of personnel; considering the organizational structures and individual intellectual levels, the priority was to streamline those workers with no records of formal schooling or with no diplomas. While making his declaration, Director General ran his eyes over such workers as Zhou, Wu, Zheng, Wang and the rest; at last he fixed his eyes on Ding.
　　Ding was a security guard, keeping watch at the gate for more than ten years, cunning by nature and well-informed of the world. Feeling disgusted at the stare from Director General, Ding said to himself, “Why fix your eyes on me? Are you considering me as the priority of streamlining? Umph!”
　　After the gathering, Ding approached Director General at once. “Director General, look at this!” said Ding, offering a red copy with printed golden characters.
　　“When did you go to college? Where did you get this diploma?” said Director General, perfectly surprised, as he looked at the copy.
　　“Director General, what a poor memory you have!” said Ding, smilingly counting his fingers. “Five years ago, while you were taking in-job training courses of an undergraduate, I realized one couldn’t do without a diploma in years to come; then I followed suit, registering in a correspondence college. It was before your graduation that I had got the diploma of a junior college. Last year, while you were taking a graduate’s refresher courses, I thought about upgrading from a junior college diploma to an undergraduate one; then I gave up because I couldn’t have the fees reimbursed; otherwise I would be studying an undergraduate’s courses now and would have got an undergraduate diploma by the time you get a graduate’s diploma.” Half convinced, Director General cast a new look at Ding and fell into silence.

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